Feliz Sabado mi gente chismosa! I love Sabado mornings, we get to catch up on some chores and get a couple errands done – Si, tipico familia latina jaja Mi casa doesn’t smell like Fabuloso though, I’ll have to search for that next time we hit up Target in the US. We stopped by Lola & Lolo’s casa for a quick visit, got a new lawn mower from Canadian Tire and just had some lunch. Busy pero va bien. “Busy” <– what every mama will tell you when you ask how things are going. “Good pero busy” Pues si, claro! A common pregunta is “how do you have time to ___?!” Y la verdad I always just laugh and say I don’t know. Pero la verdad is I want to have an honest and real answer to that pregunta, which I also ask aveces too. Asi que hoy, vamos a chismear en estar “busy” y “time”. Viendo que I already had lunch, I just have my te calientito today. Grab yourself un esnack y vamonos!
El tiempo se va como el agua. Time flies. We always hear that. This concept of time is always managing our vidas, putting pressure on our metas (goals) and sometimes even setting us up with expectations that can cause much anxiety and estres. Pues we need to get a better handle on this whole Time business porque it does play such an important role in our daily lives. Pero como? Para empezar, we need to prioritise, set attainable and realistic metas, and ignore the amargadas with their opinions and comments. Asi podras ser the mama poderosa that you’ve always been and want to continue being.
Siendo busy can be such a good thing! A lot of the time we say “busy” with such a negative connotation, como si fuera algo malo. Y aveces, it is negative – pero no siempre. We need to be more careful and aware of our choice of words and los sentimientos that we attach to them. Our words dictate and maintain our energia and our pensamientos (thoughts). Asi que, let’s try and find the positivo en being busy!
Your busyness is chosen and managed by YOU. Un modo of making sure your busyness is positivo is by planning and making time for cosas you truly enjoy. Cosas that you love, are passionate about, that get you muy excited, and that feed your soul. When you’re feliz and enjoying what you’re doing, your busyness doesn’t feel so “busy” it feels fulfilling!
Take a moment y piensa, if you could do anything in this lifetime, what would it be? Travel? Change careers? Make more time for your familia? Wake up everyday feeling excited? Write a book? Become the Prime Minister? Jaja I’m just throwing whatever ideas out there, we all have our own. Pero enserio, do you believe you can do it? Really believe? Like really really? Pues you can! It’s be done before, you wouldn’t be the frist (sorry to break it to ya jaja) and not the last. Asi que why not you?
A ver, we don’t have to be so ambitious either. Jajaja Those that I listed are pretty big dreams. Let’s think about smaller ones, the everyday, more immediate dreams. I would say, have more down time? Have more time with los chamacos? Have a consistent workout routine? Go on a familia vacation? Buy that car you want? Pues andale, you can do this all too. This is where prioridades are essential.
Having prioridades will guide you to making those dreams come true. Haz una lista of what your priorities are: time with familia, working porque we all need dinero, routine en casa to ensure a healthy living space for your familia, working out or keeping active to maintain your health, going to misa every domingo to fuel your faith. Whatever tus prioridades, stick to them. This will ensure time already scheduled in for your most important pieces to your vida feliz.
Proximamente, we have our metas (goals). I am a firm believer that we should always have metas set for ourselves and consistently be working towards at least one of them. Tus metas will give you a sense of purpose and allow yourself to focus on something to come in the future. Siempre be striving towards something. Al igual, make sure this something is also realistic and attainable for you and your familia. Be clear and precise with what you’re working on and communicate it to your partner to ensure you’re both on track. Porque? Porque your partner may have to pick up some slack, reorganise routines and also be there to apoyarte. Ademas, sharing your metas with your nearest and dearest will help keep you accountable on your action.
These metas will only be attainable through concise planning and prioritising (otra vez). Esto reminds me so much of teaching, porque this is how we unit plan. It’s called “backwards planning” porque we set out the meta (the curriculum expectation to be learned) and we work backwards on how we will get los chamacos to get there. Paso por paso (step by step) we can attain these metas. Your pasos towards your metas will require some prioritised time in your already growing schedule. Try and fit these into pockets of time that are consistently available.
Para mi, during the work week I use my time between finishing work and the boys coming to casa for squeezing in some writing and/or connecting through social media (if you don’t already follow me, hazlo! IG: @mama.poderosa). I also still have Mireya and normalmente dinner cooking on the stove, pero igual – much more manageable than when we’re all en casa. Another good time for me es cuando los chamacos go to bed. Since their bedtime is 8pm, I have a solid 2 hour window for reading, catching up on some shows while folding laundry, or some more writing. Pero mi favorite time is days like today, en los fines, when los chamacos are napping y mi esposo is training Jiu Jitsu. Jajaja Mi casa is so quiet and it’s just me, myself, and I.
Working towards your metas will require some overlapping of prioridades. As you can see, I do a lot of multitasking. Es casi imposible to not have to multitask with only 24 horas en el dia. Ya se, not everyone is a great multitasker and that’s okay! Start small, practice managing one or two simple tasks at a time, and with time you can become better at it. Pero proceed with caution con multitasking!! I can get very carried away with multitasking and end up taking on way too much in un dia, leaving myself feeling drained and exhausted! Don’t over do it. Moderation, mama.
Finalmente, ignore the amargadas. Todo el mundo does and will have an opinion on what you’re doing and how you’re doing it. We’re all guilty of it, hasta yo. I’ll be the first to admit that I am siempre noticing the way la gente does their stuff. From mi esposo doing chores or getting los chamacos dressed – to colleagues and their activities or choice of planning – hasta strangers I see at the mall trying to manage their chamacos. We all do this. Pero lo importante is how we manage it and what we do with it. Por ejemplo, do you get rude about it? Do you comment on it? Do you let it fester and build up? Do you make judgements or harsh opinions based on what you see? Tal vez que si, I used to too – aveces I still do. Pero I’m conscious about it and I am aware that, para mi, making an effort to change that is importante to my well being as well as others. Stay woke, chismosos! Jajaja.
Being on the receiving end of las amargadas isn’t always so easy to shake off. Creame, I have taken it from all angles and sources, since I was a little chamaca myself. When I first had Javi, I would take him to baby groups, la biblioteca, mom meets and mall walks (por supuesto! jaja). I would always get looks from gente and even comments on how young I looked. Pues I wasnt THAT young, 25 years old. Y even if I was younger, que te importa? Would you feel bad for me? Porque? You have no idea what kind of situation I’m in, I could be rich AF jajajaja! Enserio, less judgement chismosos!!
Another situation I can speak on was en el trabajo (at work). Supongo I’m still considered a “young teacher” pero I was hired when I was 23 years old. Pense que I was young then, pero ahora I’m like 6 years into this career and I still get treated like I should be sitting at a desk next to Leyla. Jajaja (dropped that name porque I know her mama reads this blog, shout out!!) When I came back from Mat leave, I took on this role being the Lead of the Primary Division for mi escuela. Okay, it’s a bit of extra pay, a bit more work, pero la verdad – it’s A LOT more pendejadas. Jajaja. There will always be some amargada trying to bring you down. Stay professional, stay in your lane and stay focused – you can and you will conquer it all. Y yo tambien. So coman mier… jaja
We all have the same 24 horas en el dia. We all have trabajo, responsibilities, familia, amigos, and life happening. Constantamente and it don’t stop. Don’t let this be your excuse, let this be your motivation. If not now, cuando? If not you, quien? Let it be ahora, and let it be tu! If you want to, truly want to – you will make the time, even create pockets of extra time. Time is just a concept, don’t let it rule you – you need to rule time. Asi que the next time someone asks me, “how do you find the time?” les voy a decir, “it’s not about finding the time. It’s about making the time, setting priorities, goals and ignoring the bull…” This is YOUR time, TU VIDA, how do you want to spend it?
*Pic from @weallgrowlatina on IG. * & I just ordered the book, Jefa de tu vida by Charuca off of Amazon (and other libros for mis chamacos) and I cannot wait to read this!! I will keep you posted on my feels about it.*